1. I have a Snuggy (Snuggie?). I am wearing it right now. :p
2.When I was younger I used to keep Japanese beetles as pets. Leaves, blueberries and a little bit of water is all they need. I had one for a whole 2 weeks, but I felt bad and let him go.
3. Occasionally I listen to Christian talk radio in the car. I'm not Christian, but I find it interesting and sometimes a little concerning.
4. Actually, I've been interested in religions for a long time. At different points in my life, I have considered myself: Catholic, an atheist, Wiccan, LaVeyan Satanist, Hellenistic Pagan, agnostic, Buddhist. And I used to attend a Methodist church when I was dating Rich, which I actually did not mind. If I were going to be Christian, that would be my denomination of choice.
5. I love buffalo. I don't know why. I have about a trillion stuffed bison, model bison, bison trinkets, etc. Sometimes I think I may have been a Native American in a past life, between that and how I've always loved horses, too. . .especially Appaloosas, which were started by the Nez Perce indians. :p
6. Don't think I get angry? Don't ever drive with me for any length of time. I've had horrific road rage for years, although it's gotten better lately. We're talking, if someone passed me on a 2 lane road, I'd chase them no matter how fast they were going, high beams on, blaring my horn, yelling out the window, etc. That happened on several occasions. I'm not sure my ire towards asshole drivers will ever disappear completely.
7. I hated college. My life fell apart while I was in Tennessee, hit rock bottom in Virginia, and then was a constant roller coaster while at URI. It's too much to get into, but I spent the better part of those 6.5 years being unhealthy and unhappy. High school wasn't *amazing* but at least I had some kind of direction and self-worth.
8. I can play the electric bass a little bit. I can play a bunch of Green Day songs, The Clash songs, some Weezer. . I don't know. I haven't even picked up the thing in awhile.
9. I want to learn to speak Tagalog aka the language of the Phillippines. I just like the name and the fact that "ng" is a word.
10. I'm reading War and Peace and I f'ing love it. I'll probably read it again someday, it's that good.
11. It's a bit ironic, but I am an emetophobe (fear of vomiting). I've never had a stomach virus in my entire life and I'm absolutely terrified of someday getting one. If I know I've been around someone that's been sick, I pretty much scald my hands and then douse them in Purell to keep from catching it.
12. I don't like kids and I never, ever want any. It doesn't matter if they are babies or toddlers or even older than that. I don't know what to say to or do with them. If I ever got pregnant, I would absolutely have an abortion because I don't want to go through any of the shit that comes with being pregnant, nevermind actually giving birth.
13. Even when *I* was a kid, I didn't like playing with dolls or anything like that. I remember my parents asked if I wanted a little brother or sister and I adamantly said NO, haha. I've always loved horses though and animals in general, so I'm not a complete monster. :p
14. I've been thisclose to starting my own little soap and bath stuff business several times over the past few years. But I always get discouraged and don't think my stuff is that good, so I always back down.
15. I love fashion, models, that whole bit. My favorite designers are Marc Jacobs, Alexander McQueen and John Galliano. Cant go wrong with anything from Dior, either. Prada always has great purses, though they cost the equivalent to what I make in a year. :p And I consider the Kate Spade scarf I got for $20 at a thrift shop in Boston to be one of my best purchses ever.
16. I love anarchism as a theory (and if you think I'm talking about mass chaos and destruction GO READ A FRICKEN BOOK ON THE SUBJECT v_v), but I know it would never be possible in reality.
17. Therefore, I believe that if we must have a government, then it be one that helps that its citizens lead better lives. . .and not just the wealthy. I definitely lead towards socialism (and if you think I'm talking about something akin to Stalin's Russia GO READ ANOTHER FRICKEN BOOK) and completely despise capitalism.
18. I have a stick collection. Yeah, when I'm walking outside or in the park or whatever, if I feel a special affinity for a stick I come across, I keep it.
19. I normally don't care about cars, but I am in love with Mini Coopers. I die a little inside every time someone drives by me in one.
20. I love Air Supply in a "they're so campy/awful/sappy they're great" way, haha.
21. I don't really care for technology, to a certain point. Cell phone? Good for emergencies, but I don't need it on me 24/7. In fact, I go whole days without turning my on, sometimes. MP3 player? I have one, but when I'm puttering around the house, I prefer my good ol' Discman. Don't get me wrong, I think the Internet is great, but I just don't like how everything is becoming digitized and. . .not physical these days. I'm especially bothered by the Kindle. If they ever stop producing books, I am gonna *start* my own commune somewhere, haha.
22. I am 100% Italian. I would love to go to Italy someday and visit the towns my family originated from (Itri, between Rome and Naples on the west coast and Bari, on the east coast).
23. I like collecting women's magazines from the 1920s and 30s. I also enjoy collecting old cookbooks and old books on things I'm interested in historically, such as the one I have on the Spanish American War from just a few years after it ended. Antique shops = lots of fun.
24. I'm gonna be really sad when Angela Lansbury dies.
25. I'm not tagging anyone cuz I don't freaking want to. a) I don't even talk to 25 people and b) most of you all who have read this have already done it! THE END
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Vroom Vroom
Before I start this entry, I just want to apologize for the fact that I am an awful replier to comments. I've been that way ever since I've had a blog, which goes back to 2000 or so! ;p But do know that I read and appreciate each and every comment I get on here, on AIM, on Facebook, wherever. ^__^
Yesterday I had a craptastic riding lesson. I've been riding the same horse for a few weeks now-- Dandy, a cute palomino gelding-- and with every passing week, he kept getting better and better. See, when they got Dandy, he was extremely out of shape, overweight and just not very well trained. The first time I rode him, I literally had to kick him to get him to go anywhere, he wouldn't bend at ALL in the direction we were going, and getting him to canter even a few strides was a literal process. But as I said, every week I rode him, he began to improve. The last time I rode him (before yesterday), we had some VERY nice circles and his cantering work was 290594 times better-- we even made it 3 times around the ring both ways, without stopping!
Yesterday was a different story. I feel like we took a billion steps backwards, and I seriously hope that is NOT the case. I knew he was going to be a "joy" from the moment I brought him in the ring-- I could barely stop him to pull down the stirrups and prepare to get on him, he just wanted to keep walking. And then as soon as I did get on him, he wanted to trot straightaway-- forget walking. His bending was again nonexistant, he kept doing funky things with his head to evade the bit, and every time one of the other horses in the ring passed him he wanted to speed up to meet them. To make matters worse, the ring was very dusty since there were 3 of us riding and I think that was making him a little spooky-- every time one of the horses so much as kicked up a stone, I could feel him get all tense. And what was embarrassing for me was that a girl who's new to the barn was watching me ride and I know this couldn't have made a good impression on her. :/
It just sucked because I KNOW Dandy can behave and be really good. I think if we had been alone in the ring, he probably would have been awesome. We did have a *few* good circles and he had some decent canter transitions, but the majority of the time he was just so distracted. Not to lay all the blame on him, but I know that because he was so "up" I was not as relaxed as I could be, and that's a vicious circle right there, since horses are so tuned in to how their rider is feeling. My instructor said I did well with him, but it's just so hard to agree when we've had much better weeks. I guess that's part of working with a green horse though, right?
And it was kind of funny, because I think Dandy knew he had been a brat. I brought a few treats for him, but I only gave him one before my lesson telling him he had to earn the rest. Afterwards, I was in no rush to give him the rest, but before I left I went to go visit him back in his stall and figured I'd give him the treats then. Do you know that he was reluctant to take them? It was like he understood that he was supposed to behave in order to get them. :P (Oh, and it's not that he didn't like the treats-- he kept trying to sniff at my pockets where I had them the whole time I was getting him ready, haha).
So, that was yesterday. Today I get to work for 3954 hours, but it's truck day so it should be alright.
Yesterday I had a craptastic riding lesson. I've been riding the same horse for a few weeks now-- Dandy, a cute palomino gelding-- and with every passing week, he kept getting better and better. See, when they got Dandy, he was extremely out of shape, overweight and just not very well trained. The first time I rode him, I literally had to kick him to get him to go anywhere, he wouldn't bend at ALL in the direction we were going, and getting him to canter even a few strides was a literal process. But as I said, every week I rode him, he began to improve. The last time I rode him (before yesterday), we had some VERY nice circles and his cantering work was 290594 times better-- we even made it 3 times around the ring both ways, without stopping!
Yesterday was a different story. I feel like we took a billion steps backwards, and I seriously hope that is NOT the case. I knew he was going to be a "joy" from the moment I brought him in the ring-- I could barely stop him to pull down the stirrups and prepare to get on him, he just wanted to keep walking. And then as soon as I did get on him, he wanted to trot straightaway-- forget walking. His bending was again nonexistant, he kept doing funky things with his head to evade the bit, and every time one of the other horses in the ring passed him he wanted to speed up to meet them. To make matters worse, the ring was very dusty since there were 3 of us riding and I think that was making him a little spooky-- every time one of the horses so much as kicked up a stone, I could feel him get all tense. And what was embarrassing for me was that a girl who's new to the barn was watching me ride and I know this couldn't have made a good impression on her. :/
It just sucked because I KNOW Dandy can behave and be really good. I think if we had been alone in the ring, he probably would have been awesome. We did have a *few* good circles and he had some decent canter transitions, but the majority of the time he was just so distracted. Not to lay all the blame on him, but I know that because he was so "up" I was not as relaxed as I could be, and that's a vicious circle right there, since horses are so tuned in to how their rider is feeling. My instructor said I did well with him, but it's just so hard to agree when we've had much better weeks. I guess that's part of working with a green horse though, right?
And it was kind of funny, because I think Dandy knew he had been a brat. I brought a few treats for him, but I only gave him one before my lesson telling him he had to earn the rest. Afterwards, I was in no rush to give him the rest, but before I left I went to go visit him back in his stall and figured I'd give him the treats then. Do you know that he was reluctant to take them? It was like he understood that he was supposed to behave in order to get them. :P (Oh, and it's not that he didn't like the treats-- he kept trying to sniff at my pockets where I had them the whole time I was getting him ready, haha).
So, that was yesterday. Today I get to work for 3954 hours, but it's truck day so it should be alright.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
The Word For the Past Few Days
was DWELLING.
You already know some of it. You know I was upset about old feelings cropping up, having to do with lonliness and starting to worry about what I was eating. Then I read something alluding to me online (thanks, Facebook) that hurt me quite a bit. It was especially bad timing because Travis and I are coming up on "that" anniversary, aka the one when my other two serious, long-term relationships basically ended. There's NO reason to think that something would happen in the next few days that would cause some kind of horrific, irreconcilable rift between us (seriously. . .what? haha) but I know there's a part of my mind that is a little. . .off.
So I went around being all grumpy and not-very-talkative and just feeling my mind being swamped in this stew of nastiness. When it gets like this, it's very hard for me to articulate *what* I'm feeling, which is why it's easier not to say anything.
I hate to say it, but 9 times out of 10, what gets me out of my head is going to work. It's not that I love ol' RA, but it at least gives me something else to do and offers plenty of opportunities for just being present with what's happening at the moment and practicing equanimity and sometimes even friendliness.
And so, between the time I ate breakfast and when I actually left the office to do stuff, that's when I had my "dwelling epiphany." So much of what was bothering me was tied to who I used to be, which is quite a different beast from what I am now. I worked so hard last year at becoming a better caretaker to myself, but all because of some things that reminded me of the past, I was almost ready to throw in the towel again.
But when I stopped and looked at the present moment, I saw that things were going pretty well. I had just finished eating a healthy breakfast. Everyone had showed up that was supposed to. People had been pleasant so far. I even felt okay about the snow, because that probably meant it would be a quiet day, and I prefer that by far (and there was actually stuff to do, so we wouldn't be bored). There was really nothing to be upset about at that moment. As the day went on, I continued to feel happier and by the time I left, I was basically back to normal.
Since no state of mind is premanent, I know I'll probably feel down about the aforementioned things again, but at least now I've had experiences like this one, when I've been able to actively guide myself in a better direction. It's so important to be able to do this, but easier said then done sometimes.
There is more I was hoping to write, but I need to do a few things today before it gets too late. And I have a riding lesson later, so I don't have all day. :p
The only other thing I want to say right now is to please feel thankful for all that you do have, especially with the way the economy's been. I live right near one of the area's food pantries and it seems like every week the crowd there gets bigger and bigger. Today I drove past at 9am or so and there was already a crowd at the door and a line down the parking lot. There were so many cars that people had to park in the church lot right next door. Things should not be this way in this country and I can only hope that this administration can start making some changes that will actually do *good* for once. I know, I know, it's a way long, complicated thing that I could write an entire entry on, but just please keep all the people who have less than you do in your thoughts. Any one of us could find ourselves in that predicament very easily, so let's practice compassion instead of feelings of superiority.
You already know some of it. You know I was upset about old feelings cropping up, having to do with lonliness and starting to worry about what I was eating. Then I read something alluding to me online (thanks, Facebook) that hurt me quite a bit. It was especially bad timing because Travis and I are coming up on "that" anniversary, aka the one when my other two serious, long-term relationships basically ended. There's NO reason to think that something would happen in the next few days that would cause some kind of horrific, irreconcilable rift between us (seriously. . .what? haha) but I know there's a part of my mind that is a little. . .off.
So I went around being all grumpy and not-very-talkative and just feeling my mind being swamped in this stew of nastiness. When it gets like this, it's very hard for me to articulate *what* I'm feeling, which is why it's easier not to say anything.
I hate to say it, but 9 times out of 10, what gets me out of my head is going to work. It's not that I love ol' RA, but it at least gives me something else to do and offers plenty of opportunities for just being present with what's happening at the moment and practicing equanimity and sometimes even friendliness.
And so, between the time I ate breakfast and when I actually left the office to do stuff, that's when I had my "dwelling epiphany." So much of what was bothering me was tied to who I used to be, which is quite a different beast from what I am now. I worked so hard last year at becoming a better caretaker to myself, but all because of some things that reminded me of the past, I was almost ready to throw in the towel again.
But when I stopped and looked at the present moment, I saw that things were going pretty well. I had just finished eating a healthy breakfast. Everyone had showed up that was supposed to. People had been pleasant so far. I even felt okay about the snow, because that probably meant it would be a quiet day, and I prefer that by far (and there was actually stuff to do, so we wouldn't be bored). There was really nothing to be upset about at that moment. As the day went on, I continued to feel happier and by the time I left, I was basically back to normal.
Since no state of mind is premanent, I know I'll probably feel down about the aforementioned things again, but at least now I've had experiences like this one, when I've been able to actively guide myself in a better direction. It's so important to be able to do this, but easier said then done sometimes.
There is more I was hoping to write, but I need to do a few things today before it gets too late. And I have a riding lesson later, so I don't have all day. :p
The only other thing I want to say right now is to please feel thankful for all that you do have, especially with the way the economy's been. I live right near one of the area's food pantries and it seems like every week the crowd there gets bigger and bigger. Today I drove past at 9am or so and there was already a crowd at the door and a line down the parking lot. There were so many cars that people had to park in the church lot right next door. Things should not be this way in this country and I can only hope that this administration can start making some changes that will actually do *good* for once. I know, I know, it's a way long, complicated thing that I could write an entire entry on, but just please keep all the people who have less than you do in your thoughts. Any one of us could find ourselves in that predicament very easily, so let's practice compassion instead of feelings of superiority.
Monday, February 2, 2009
::yawn::
Yeah, sue me. I took a few days off.
I've been unexpectedly dealing with some shit feelings rising up again, suddenly. I think part of it is I am sick to DEATH of the people I know who keep going on and on and on about their annoying diets, and I'd like to think it doesn't bother me, but maybe it does. Yesterday was the first time I forever that I did NOT want to eat my lunch because I wasn't sure how it was going to turn out. I ate anyway (god, it was just miso soup with soba noodles, snap peas and hummus and a little pack of dark chocolate peanut M&Ms), and it was fine, but it's like. . .I don't need that again.
And secondly, I've been dealing with feelings of sucking at friendship again. I admit: I'm an awful friend, which is probably why I can count the ones I have on one hand. Half a hand, really. This, in turn makes my anger rise not just towards other people, but towards myself for my own failures and THAT contributes to The Problem Alluded At Above and it's just this vicous, awful cycle that needs to be broken NOW.
I've been trying to make today a good/better day. I drove to the bookstore and spent a lot of time there, browsing through books and magazines. Then I drove to Sophie's and had some tea and wrote in my notebook. Now I'm probably just going to play World of Warcraft for 38593 hours, and maybe later I'll go to yoga class because I kinda need it today.
So, I'm sorry that this entry is such a downer. I'm working on it.
I've been unexpectedly dealing with some shit feelings rising up again, suddenly. I think part of it is I am sick to DEATH of the people I know who keep going on and on and on about their annoying diets, and I'd like to think it doesn't bother me, but maybe it does. Yesterday was the first time I forever that I did NOT want to eat my lunch because I wasn't sure how it was going to turn out. I ate anyway (god, it was just miso soup with soba noodles, snap peas and hummus and a little pack of dark chocolate peanut M&Ms), and it was fine, but it's like. . .I don't need that again.
And secondly, I've been dealing with feelings of sucking at friendship again. I admit: I'm an awful friend, which is probably why I can count the ones I have on one hand. Half a hand, really. This, in turn makes my anger rise not just towards other people, but towards myself for my own failures and THAT contributes to The Problem Alluded At Above and it's just this vicous, awful cycle that needs to be broken NOW.
I've been trying to make today a good/better day. I drove to the bookstore and spent a lot of time there, browsing through books and magazines. Then I drove to Sophie's and had some tea and wrote in my notebook. Now I'm probably just going to play World of Warcraft for 38593 hours, and maybe later I'll go to yoga class because I kinda need it today.
So, I'm sorry that this entry is such a downer. I'm working on it.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Amazing
So, you know, I've been kinda pissed at myself because I haven't been incorporating yoga into my day like I want to. To make matters worse, I even have a yoga pass for All That Matters, so I can go to any class I want, whenever. For the past few days, I planned on going to a 9:30 yoga class at least once. Both mornings, I woke up and knew I'd much rather be doing my usual eat-breakfast-have-coffee-do-crosswords routine then getting dolled up for yoga class. So I ditched going to class and then spent the rest of the day feeling bad about it.
Today was the same deal. 9:30 class, woke up with plenty of time to spare, decided I'd rather not. At first I sat down at my computer, with my yogurt/pumpkin/granola concoction and my coffee and guiltily did my first crossword, wondering why I even bothered getting the freaking yoga pass.
So I kinda stepped back mentally and said what the hell. Why was I avoiding yoga so much, or was it something else entirely? And then that tiny, smart voice that sometimes makes an appearance said "why don't you just deal with the fact that you like having mornings to do whatever and simply go to evening classes instead?"
Seriously.
I felt better almost immediately.
I am so used to telling myself "you've got to do this and if you don't everything is going to be ruined and awful." I am so used to feeling like I've absolutely got to live up to certain expectations or else I am failing in the eyes of whoever is paying attention. Just the simple act of realizing that I CAN break what I "planned" to do and that the world won't end because of it is pretty radical for me. There's nothing wrong with me wanting my mornings free, that's just how I am. In fact, realizing that means that I can plan accordingly. Maybe instead of riding in the afternoon, I can ride in the morning (around 11) and then I'll definitely have time for other stuff in the evening. That is something I would be more willing to do.
Another thing that's interesting is that I have been craving more salads and crunchy, raw foods lately-- which are the exact opposite from what my dosha ought to have. Those foods *are* considered good for kapha, which has the qualities of heaviness, laziness and inertia, which kinda describes how I've been feeling mentally for a few days. :p Maybe actually listening to my internal cues and eating what my body wants to eat is helping me make these other revelations too. I believe that body and mind are interconnected, so it would make sense.
Well, that's all I have for now. Hope you all have a good day!
Today was the same deal. 9:30 class, woke up with plenty of time to spare, decided I'd rather not. At first I sat down at my computer, with my yogurt/pumpkin/granola concoction and my coffee and guiltily did my first crossword, wondering why I even bothered getting the freaking yoga pass.
So I kinda stepped back mentally and said what the hell. Why was I avoiding yoga so much, or was it something else entirely? And then that tiny, smart voice that sometimes makes an appearance said "why don't you just deal with the fact that you like having mornings to do whatever and simply go to evening classes instead?"
Seriously.
I felt better almost immediately.
I am so used to telling myself "you've got to do this and if you don't everything is going to be ruined and awful." I am so used to feeling like I've absolutely got to live up to certain expectations or else I am failing in the eyes of whoever is paying attention. Just the simple act of realizing that I CAN break what I "planned" to do and that the world won't end because of it is pretty radical for me. There's nothing wrong with me wanting my mornings free, that's just how I am. In fact, realizing that means that I can plan accordingly. Maybe instead of riding in the afternoon, I can ride in the morning (around 11) and then I'll definitely have time for other stuff in the evening. That is something I would be more willing to do.
Another thing that's interesting is that I have been craving more salads and crunchy, raw foods lately-- which are the exact opposite from what my dosha ought to have. Those foods *are* considered good for kapha, which has the qualities of heaviness, laziness and inertia, which kinda describes how I've been feeling mentally for a few days. :p Maybe actually listening to my internal cues and eating what my body wants to eat is helping me make these other revelations too. I believe that body and mind are interconnected, so it would make sense.
Well, that's all I have for now. Hope you all have a good day!
Sunday, January 25, 2009
For the Horde!
j/k
Kind of.
hehe
So yesterday was a good day all around. Travis and I drove to CT and I FINALLY found out what happened to my saddle.
Last May I decided that even if I started riding again, I was not going to want my old saddle. It was in good condition, but just not what I wanted anymore. So, I brought it to a tack shop in CT and put it on consignment.
Months passed and I didn't hear anything. Then one day I got a call: some people were interested in my saddle, but would I be willing to lower the price? That was fine with me.
Awhile more passed. . .nothing. This is when I was just beginning lessons, so I was going back and forth to the tack shop quite a few times. One time I went and didn't see my saddle anywhere, so I asked if it had been sold afterall. At first the woman couldn't find any of the papers regarding my saddle, which was a bit alarming. Finally she realized that someone was trying my saddle at the moment, hence its absence. Again, if these people might take it, fine by me.
I went back, probably a week later, to get different half-chaps and check up on things. This time the woman said that the people bought my saddle, so I could be expecting a check as soon as theirs cleared. Sweet. Let's keep in mind, this was October.
Months passed, with no call and no check. I was left wondering if it had gotten lost in the mail, or if the people had decided not to buy it, etc. etc. I wanted to go there and person to find out what the deal was, but as this place is in CT, past Foxwoods, it's a bit of hike. Things kept coming up, and I just never found the time to go there.
Well, yesterday was that day.
The verdict?
They just plain forgot to send me a check. ~_~
But they wrote me one right there, so I now have another nice chunk of change to divide up and use wisely. Just wish it had happened sooner. :p
I also had a pretty good first day of trying to get myself back on track. If you're not interested in the details, just read the bold stuff.
I have nothing in the house for breakfast, so all I could scrounge up was a bowl of Puffins cereal and some coffee. Before we left for CT, I had a slice of leftover pizza, with most of the cold cheese pulled off and tossed. I don't like the rubbery feeling. x_x After the tack shop, we stopped at Applebee's in Westerly, and I had an Oriental Grilled Chicken Salad, which was good and thankfully NOT slathered in salad dressing. But it might as well been drowning in dressing, because Travis and I split a chocolate chip cookie sundae. Oh well, that was my outright junk for the day. ^__^
Later that night I made a big batch of vegetarian chili, using soy ground beef, kidney beans, canned tomatoes and tomato paste. I seasoned it with oregano, cumin, onion powder, garlic, cayenne pepper and some red pepper flakes for good measure. I wasn't really following a recipe (except for some ideas about the spices to use), but amazingly it came out REALLY tasty! I had a big bowl of that with a salad of spinach, sliced beets, olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Mmm mmm mm. And finally, for dessert later that night I had my usual apple dish-- a sliced apple heated with ghee, cinnamon, nutmeg and cardamom seeds. So fricken good, haha.
So it wasn't the *best* day ever, but miles ahead of the way I've been eating lately.
And I guess that's it. I have to get in SOME world of warcraft before work. :p
Kind of.
hehe
So yesterday was a good day all around. Travis and I drove to CT and I FINALLY found out what happened to my saddle.
Last May I decided that even if I started riding again, I was not going to want my old saddle. It was in good condition, but just not what I wanted anymore. So, I brought it to a tack shop in CT and put it on consignment.
Months passed and I didn't hear anything. Then one day I got a call: some people were interested in my saddle, but would I be willing to lower the price? That was fine with me.
Awhile more passed. . .nothing. This is when I was just beginning lessons, so I was going back and forth to the tack shop quite a few times. One time I went and didn't see my saddle anywhere, so I asked if it had been sold afterall. At first the woman couldn't find any of the papers regarding my saddle, which was a bit alarming. Finally she realized that someone was trying my saddle at the moment, hence its absence. Again, if these people might take it, fine by me.
I went back, probably a week later, to get different half-chaps and check up on things. This time the woman said that the people bought my saddle, so I could be expecting a check as soon as theirs cleared. Sweet. Let's keep in mind, this was October.
Months passed, with no call and no check. I was left wondering if it had gotten lost in the mail, or if the people had decided not to buy it, etc. etc. I wanted to go there and person to find out what the deal was, but as this place is in CT, past Foxwoods, it's a bit of hike. Things kept coming up, and I just never found the time to go there.
Well, yesterday was that day.
The verdict?
They just plain forgot to send me a check. ~_~
But they wrote me one right there, so I now have another nice chunk of change to divide up and use wisely. Just wish it had happened sooner. :p
I also had a pretty good first day of trying to get myself back on track. If you're not interested in the details, just read the bold stuff.
I have nothing in the house for breakfast, so all I could scrounge up was a bowl of Puffins cereal and some coffee. Before we left for CT, I had a slice of leftover pizza, with most of the cold cheese pulled off and tossed. I don't like the rubbery feeling. x_x After the tack shop, we stopped at Applebee's in Westerly, and I had an Oriental Grilled Chicken Salad, which was good and thankfully NOT slathered in salad dressing. But it might as well been drowning in dressing, because Travis and I split a chocolate chip cookie sundae. Oh well, that was my outright junk for the day. ^__^
Later that night I made a big batch of vegetarian chili, using soy ground beef, kidney beans, canned tomatoes and tomato paste. I seasoned it with oregano, cumin, onion powder, garlic, cayenne pepper and some red pepper flakes for good measure. I wasn't really following a recipe (except for some ideas about the spices to use), but amazingly it came out REALLY tasty! I had a big bowl of that with a salad of spinach, sliced beets, olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Mmm mmm mm. And finally, for dessert later that night I had my usual apple dish-- a sliced apple heated with ghee, cinnamon, nutmeg and cardamom seeds. So fricken good, haha.
So it wasn't the *best* day ever, but miles ahead of the way I've been eating lately.
And I guess that's it. I have to get in SOME world of warcraft before work. :p
Friday, January 23, 2009
Please Press Reset
That's kinda how I feel right now. Like I wish there was a reset button for my life when I can feel that maybe, here and there, I'm starting to slip. Easier said than done though.
I'm getting more nervous about my various aches and pains, which I'm not 100% sure anymore are being caused by my pinched nerve. I've been eating like crap recently, lots of empty carbs and coffee and sugary stuff. I've had next to no vegetables for days now, which is awful. It's just so hard to motivate myself right now. . .I mean, I bought stuff to make several good meals but have I? No. I could have made something tonight for instance, but instead I opted for pizza. I guess that's okay though, because I didn't have a real lunch. . .just a protein bar and diet moutain dew. Yay.
I think I was a little frustrated because everyone I worked with today is seemingly obsessed with talking about how much and what they eat. It gets so TIRING after awhile. One of them asked if I thought eating a small grilled chicken sandwich from D'Angelos was "too much." Of course I said "no," because it's NOT but I had half a mind to be like "please, you don't even KNOW what it's like to eat 'too much.'" Eating too much is finishing whole bags of nachos and jars of salsa at a time, then having 2 packets of Ramen noodles or Easy Mac, then a whole container of applesauce, some pudding cups and *still* going out for donuts. Too much is eating whole boxes of cereal at a time. Too much is eating so many cookies before bed you feel hungover the next morning. I don't think I need to go on.
It just sucks having to listen to other people bitch about this all the time because I wish I could be honest about what I've gone through, but I can't. All I can say, and sometimes I do, is that it really is much easier and much more sensible to eat what you want, mostly healthy food but some junk too, and try not to worry about it. The idea of it is more daunting than anything.
But I digress. Don't even know where I'm going with this, just felt like venting. I will try, really try to get myself back on track this weekend, if anything because eating better might help me feel better.
Well, back to reading War and Peace. Tomorrow I might actually go to CT and find out what happened to my saddle. . .
I'm getting more nervous about my various aches and pains, which I'm not 100% sure anymore are being caused by my pinched nerve. I've been eating like crap recently, lots of empty carbs and coffee and sugary stuff. I've had next to no vegetables for days now, which is awful. It's just so hard to motivate myself right now. . .I mean, I bought stuff to make several good meals but have I? No. I could have made something tonight for instance, but instead I opted for pizza. I guess that's okay though, because I didn't have a real lunch. . .just a protein bar and diet moutain dew. Yay.
I think I was a little frustrated because everyone I worked with today is seemingly obsessed with talking about how much and what they eat. It gets so TIRING after awhile. One of them asked if I thought eating a small grilled chicken sandwich from D'Angelos was "too much." Of course I said "no," because it's NOT but I had half a mind to be like "please, you don't even KNOW what it's like to eat 'too much.'" Eating too much is finishing whole bags of nachos and jars of salsa at a time, then having 2 packets of Ramen noodles or Easy Mac, then a whole container of applesauce, some pudding cups and *still* going out for donuts. Too much is eating whole boxes of cereal at a time. Too much is eating so many cookies before bed you feel hungover the next morning. I don't think I need to go on.
It just sucks having to listen to other people bitch about this all the time because I wish I could be honest about what I've gone through, but I can't. All I can say, and sometimes I do, is that it really is much easier and much more sensible to eat what you want, mostly healthy food but some junk too, and try not to worry about it. The idea of it is more daunting than anything.
But I digress. Don't even know where I'm going with this, just felt like venting. I will try, really try to get myself back on track this weekend, if anything because eating better might help me feel better.
Well, back to reading War and Peace. Tomorrow I might actually go to CT and find out what happened to my saddle. . .
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